Humor is the Best Antidote

by Jon Hazen - December 1996

A disconnected commentary by an outdoor columnist contended that fly angling, and spinfishing with a fly, are one and the same. The word on the street is the reporter's bird dog actually penned the column.

Inspired by the canine's confusion, I hearby present "Miller's dog"...a new genre of fly angling humor: Read between the lines of the column that spawned this page.

"Miller's dog is so dumb..."

  • he thinks fly dressing is something made by Kraft for salads.
  • he thinks a streamer is someone who fishes...what else? Streams.
  • he thinks a roll cast is tossing bread to the ducks on Mill Creek.
  • he thinks Korkers are steelhead baits.
  • he thinks a double haul is two truck loads of top soil.
  • he thinks a dry fly is a no-drinks America West flight.
  • he thinks Mustad 9672 is a television program.
  • he thinks stripping line is a single's bar come-on.
  • he thinks a riffle is a 30.06.
  • he thinks pocket water is a very small canteen.
  • he thinks herl refers to projectile regurgitation.
  • he thinks Sage is a kitchen spice.
  • he thinks a Royal Coachman is Prince Charles' chauffeur.
  • he thinks fly casting refers to actor Jeff Goldblum.
  • he thinks a blood knot is a marriage of cousins.
  • he thinks 4X refers to a brand of condom.
  • he thinks dubbing is a lip sync.
  • he thinks The Big Horn is taking "cuts" in a long movie line.
  • he thinks a fly rod is an insect's reproductive appendage.
  • he thinks rod wraps are corporal punishment.
  • he thinks Orvis refers to a mouth, nose, or ear.
  • he thinks mending a line means equivocation.
  • he thinks a graphite rod is a pencil.
  • he thinks Haig-Brown is a fly pattern.
  • he thinks catch and release is a sin.

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